


Over the Years

by eleuther



Series: Froger Week 2019 [7]
Category: Queen (Band)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Assault, Don't give me shit for this please, Explicit Language, Gen, Hospitals, Hurt/Comfort, I know how some people feel about writing Freddie's AIDS, Illnesses, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault, It's not exactly said but it's heavily implied in the beginning, Mentions of hospitals, Prompt: Holding Hands, References to HIV/AIDS, References to Illness, cuz it wasn't supposed to be, don't ask how i managed to make this one hurt, it isnt graphic, its rated properly dont worry, just roger being emotional, mentions of illnesses
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-10
Updated: 2019-11-10
Packaged: 2021-01-27 04:04:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,765
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21385801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eleuther/pseuds/eleuther
Summary: Some snippets from Roger and Freddie holding hands over the years.*This isn't soft and fluffy.
Relationships: Freddie Mercury & Roger Taylor
Series: Froger Week 2019 [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1536286
Comments: 4
Kudos: 35
Collections: Froger!Week 2019





	Over the Years

**Author's Note:**

  * For [emma_and_orlando](https://archiveofourown.org/users/emma_and_orlando/gifts).

> someone lmk how i managed to make the softest prompt of the week fucking angsty as shit. i guess i wanted to end with a bang. this one hurts, i almost cried while writing the end. it's supposed to be platonic but you can take it as romantic-ish? i think? 
> 
> also, please don't give me shit for this. this does talk about freddie's illness. if you have a problem with that, please just dont read it. i put it here and in the tags, so you all have plenty of warning. i know some people dont like when its written about, but i really wanted to include it in this one and i made it as non-graphic as possible. its mostly just freddie and roger interacting, anyway, and a mention of him dying but like as a possibility in the future. 
> 
> and yes, im aware they found out in 1987, this is a work of fiction.
> 
> anyway, please enjoy!!

**Over The Years**

_1969_

A night out was exactly what Freddie needed after the day he’d had. Of course, school wasn’t exactly his passion but part of him tried to be realistic and actually put the effort in. When that effort wasn’t shown in the grade, well, he tried not to seem like he cared so much. 

So now he was at a club, with a few people with which he was merely acquaintances. He’d lost most of them long ago, now dancing with one Roger Taylor, whom he’d met twice before tonight. He enjoyed Roger’s company, and if either of them made the effort they’d likely be incredibly good friends. 

Freddie also thought Roger was rather attractive, but he had no idea how Roger felt about such relations and knew better than to ask. 

“I’m gonna grab another drink,” Roger called. “Do you want anything?” 

Freddie shook his head, his half full drink still tightly gripped in his hand. Roger nodded with a bright smile and headed towards the bar. 

Freddie joined the group next to him, still dancing to the beat. He thought about one day being the music these clubs and pubs played. On one hand he didn’t want to become the generic background noise often heard; on the other, the thought of being that famous sent a thrill through him. 

A glance at his watch told him that it had been nearly fifteen minutes since Roger left. The bar hadn’t looked that crowded, but maybe an influx of people had swarmed over the same time he had. Or maybe he had picked up some bird and left with her. Freddie had no reason to feel the sudden knot in his stomach. 

Regardless, he moved off the dance floor and over to the bar. It took him a moment to find the blond, because there had in fact been a swarm of people, but when he did see him the knot worsened. Roger was pressed tightly against the bar, edging away from some burly man who seemed to think he was into him. Or maybe he thought Roger was a girl; the longer hair would surely cause some to make that mistake. Freddie could see his discomfort regardless of the situation, and made his way over.

“Is there a problem?” he asked. Roger jumped at his voice, but relief flashed across his face when he realized who it was.

“We’re just talkin, mate. Why don’t you leave it, yeah?” The man smirked as he spoke, and Freddie did not want to leave Roger with him.

“Rog, you alright?”

He cast both Freddie and the man unsure eyes. “Um, yeah. I was thinking of heading back to the flat, actually.” 

“Great! I’ll walk you home,” Freddie said. When the man looked at him strangely, he grasped onto Roger’s hand loose by his side. He regretted it almost immediately, because what if Roger thought he was coming onto him? He barely knew the guy, and even if they were better friends it would still be weird! But this guy had been flirting - fairly aggressively, from the looks of it - so he hoped that he wouldn’t try anything. 

“Hm,” he said. “Next time then, blondie?” 

He walked away with a smirk, and Freddie felt a shudder run through Roger.

“Are you alright?” he asked. 

“Yeah, yeah. I’m fine. I do actually want to head back to my flat, though.” He paused and looked at Freddie curiously. “Are you really gonna walk me back?”

Freddie smiled. “Sure, why not? A great chance for us to get to know each other better.” 

Roger smiled and nodded, before dragging Freddie out of the pub. They stumbled down the street together, talk and giggling like madmen - or drunks, which they very much were - all the way across town. Roger lived farther away than he’d presumed, so his own walk home had been longer than he anticipated. But he didn’t mind. 

The best part, in Freddie’s opinion, was that Roger held onto his hand the entire walk home.

*

_1973_

The hospital was cold. The waiting room was nearly empty, save the three men sitting in silence, huddled together in the shitty plastic chairs. 

Roger had no idea how much time had passed, and no energy to look at the clock. He stared blankly at the door they had taken Brian through, and hoped that at some point soon someone would come tell them what the hell was going on. 

“Rog, love. Deacy’s going to get some coffee from the cafeteria. Do you want anything?” Freddie asked, voice soft and calm, which somehow pissed Roger off. 

He just shook his head. He heard a sigh from next to him and felt more frustration at them, but didn’t act. He just stared at the door. 

A moment later he felt a pressure on his hand. He glanced down to Freddie’s hand now resting in his own and squeezed. He had no reason to be angry or frustrated at them for trying to help, even though he wanted to be. He was angry at everything right now; at Brian for not saying anything, the doctors for not telling them anything, and the nurse at the desk for not letting them see him. He shouldn’t take all that anger out on Freddie or John. 

Roger leaned his head on Freddie’s shoulder and gripped his hand tighter. He felt awful for shamelessly seeking out comfort when they should be focusing on Brian; he wasn’t the one possibly dying in a hospital bed. But without the energy to yell at the hospital staff - which was entirely unfair, of course - he had no idea what else to do. 

“Oh Rog, love, he’ll be fine. Brian will be alright,” Freddie said. Roger had no idea why he was telling him this until he felt tears drip onto his hand. Freddie wrapped his arm tightly around him, keeping his other hand tightly in Roger’s. 

Roger tried to keep his cries muffled in Freddie’s shoulder, but he knew it wasn’t really working. His grip on Freddie’s hand got continuously tighter, and he was sure that he would be asked to let go once it got too tight. 

He didn’t ask, just squeezed back tighter. Roger found that he didn’t really want to let go, and wondered why he and Fred weren’t like this more often. Freddie was touchy with all of them, which none of them minded. He was the most touchy with Deacy, and equally as touchy with him and Brian. But Roger wanted more; selfish, he knows he sounds, but Freddie had this comforting aspect to him that reminded Roger of home, being cared for and loved. It made since in a situation like this, that they’d all be a little more clingy with each other, but how the hell did he broach the topic when everything was normal?

“Rog?” 

“Hm?” 

“You alright now?” Freddie asked, voice dripping with concern.

“Yeah, course,” Roger replied. He took that as his que to sit up and stop moping like a child, and Freddie let him. 

His hand remained tightly in Roger’s. John said nothing when he returned. 

*

_1986_

The last show of the Magic Tour was bittersweet. They all knew Freddie was sick, they knew that there was no telling how long he had left, and they knew that this was probably the end of touring. 

But Freddie didn’t want to think about that, and no one else did either. So they partied, and drank, and snorted shit that probably wasn’t helping their cause. And at the end of the night Freddie felt satisfied that they went out with a bang. 

He stumbled through the hotel lobby with a group of people he barely knew, laughing at something he had no clue about, when he saw Roger alone in the corner of the room. 

He immediately turned towards the drummer, ignoring the calls of those he left behind. 

“What are you doing out here, Roggie?”

Roger looked up at him, obviously trashed. He gave a tight lipped smile and shrugged, motioning to the chair next to him. Freddie had a feeling this was going to turn into an emotional conversation, and worried that this probably wasn’t the best place to have it. But he sat down anyway. 

“What’s going on, lovey?” 

Roger didn’t answer for a moment, and Freddie wondered if he’d even heard the question. 

“What am I supposed to do when you die?” 

Freddie flinched at the question and Roger’s voice. He sounded so heartbroken it hurt, and he truly hadn’t yet accepted that he was probably going to die. 

“I’m sorry,” Roger said when he saw Freddie’s expression. “I just - it’s hit me that tonight is probably the last show, unless they find some sort of miracle cure. And I don’t - I’m not ready for this to be the end. We still have so much to give, _you_ still have so much to give. It’s not fucking fair, Fred.” 

Freddie sighed, because it’s true and he is right. When he’d told those that he wanted to know that he was sick he hadn’t wanted everyone to make a big fuss and talk about it all the time. He didn’t want that constant reminder that he was going to die when he was trying to enjoy the rest of his life. 

Freddie grabbed Roger’s hand, drawing his attention from his lap to his face. 

“Roger, when I’m gone you are going to do what you’ve always done. Through every twist and turn life has thrown us, we have come out on the other side. You’re going to do the same thing this time. I know it’ll be hard, but please, for me, don’t let this destroy you. And don’t let this destroy the others either. You know how they both can get.”

It wasn’t fair to put that on him, but now the words were out there. He knew Roger would do it, regardless. 

“I love you, Fred. I’m sorry I brought this up, I know -”

“That’s alright dear, I knew it wasn’t fair to expect you all to just forget about it.” Freddie smiled and shook Roger’s hand lightly.

He looked up and smiled back, chuckling lightly.

“I won’t mention it again,” he said. “Now! Let’s go back to my room and get properly smashed again. I need something else after that.”

Freddie just nodded and laughed, letting the blond drag him to the elevator. He’d let Roger do anything if he it made him feel better, including hold his hand through the rest of this journey.

**Author's Note:**

> i hope you all enjoyed froger week and the wonderful fics written throughout! ive had a busy week, so i myself am excited to go through the collection and read all of them. thank you to the wonderful Amorena for organizing this week!!!


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